The Perfect Day

Today was a perfect day. I don't know that I have been able to say that about any day in the past several months. But today? Today was absolutely perfect. It was the day I had a million times in my dreams of what having a family would be like as a little girl. It was the day that my spirit ached for all those lonely years of waiting for Jerry to come along. It was that good.

This morning I woke up before anyone else. I yawned, I stretched and seeing that it was light out I knew it was day. Yet, no one was making any noise. Each day this week I woke up thinking it was Monday. So I had to do a mental check to remember it was indeed Saturday. I lay there quietly for a few minutes and finally decided to check the time. It was 9:04am! NINE OH FOUR. That is like 1pm in parent time! I mean that right there would have made my day. It definitely made my morning! I got up and got my contacts in and started coffee, tasks that are usually done with a hungry and impatient toddler in tow. But not today. Today I took my time.

Oscar woke up a few minutes later and we started our morning routine. He nursed for a bit and quickly ran to the kitchen to EAT EAT EAT, his mealtime mantra. We did animal sounds and ate cheerios. He laughed and I giggled. Jerry came out and started music. We enjoyed each other.

We'd heard of a local yard sale at a church downtown so we piled in the van (Krusty dog too) and headed over to see what we could find. I filled a bag with books and toys and a few sets of PJs for Oscar for $5 total. Then it was time to play at the park. It was a warm and sunny day but so refreshing and breezy in the shade. Oscar played with his newly thrifted golf clubs and dug in the sand.We talked, we smiled. We had family time.

Lunch was more of the same and Oscar went right down for his nap. He slept a glorious 3 hours while we had some downtime of our own. When he woke up we decided to go downtown for dinner at Tir Na Nog. It's an Irish Pub and Oscar has never been so I was interested to see how he would do. We had the best time just hanging out. There was a small wedding reception in the back room and it reminded us of our own wedding rehearsal dinner we'd had in the same space. Our lives are here. Our life together is throughout these streets and parks and restaurants. It's a beautiful thing! What we didn't know was that it was Kilt Night and Pipers came through toward the end of our meal! There were two bagpipers and a drummer. Oscar LOVED watching them play and burst into applause at the end of each song. It was adorable.

After dinner I went to a baby celebration for a friend who is having her second child in a few weeks. I spent two hours laughing, talking and commiserating with some of the most beautiful and hilarious people in the world. I know tomorrow is Mother's Day. But honestly, today was my gift. Jerry has been asking me all week what I wanted for Mother's Day and all I could think to say was I just want a day where I feel special and cared for all day long. And today I got it. Without even trying. I don't deserve this life, but I am so thankful for it!

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Starting Over....Again...

We've been doing some spring cleaning over at the Updyke house in the past couple weeks. But not in the home. No, this is cleaning out the heart stuff. And man has it gotten dusty in there! Jerry and I have both seen a lot happen in our lives in the past year of having a child. We are learning, growing, changing. In a good way! We have personal goals and mutual goals and we support and push each other to get there. It's a beautiful thing.

I recently re-joined a gym and I am really stoked. I feel energized like never before (or at least not in a LONG time) and I am finding motivation in the most unexpected ways. Jerry has been working on his own goals and we have had some of the most wonderful conversations over the past weeks. We are really learning to focus on God and our faith and how to follow Him as individuals, but also as a couple and as parents. We're settling in.

I almost feel like the honeymoon is over. But not in a bad way! No, just the opposite. When we came home from our actual honeymoon almost 3 years ago, we were exhilarated to be home. To be starting our lives together as husband and wife. We had a great time, but there was so much more to experience together than a week on the coast. And that's how I feel right now. I feel like we have been married for a couple years. We have a son. Our feet are good and wet. And now the fun really begins. There is security here. Safety. And knowing that we can weather the storms we might face together.

That love, it's there and it's deep. It's lovey and sweet and ooey gooey and fun. But it's friendship, and honesty and camaraderie. It's hopeful and faithful and truthful and comforting. It's just what I need. And I am all settled in. I'll take 50 more years of this please. Yes.

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An evening of Chamber Music

 

On Friday, Jerry was given a couple tickets to see some local classical musicians. We hadn't planned a date night but definitely needed one! We found someone to hang with Oscar (thanks Monica and Ashley!) and got all dressed up for a grown-up date. We are a jeans and t-shirts kinda couple, but wearing a dress is always a nice change. Besides the weather has been amazing and it felt great! Of course we had to do some pre-game pics in the back yard. And you know how it goes...things get silly around here a lot.

We really enjoyed the music and were just in awe of the dedication of the musicians. To do what they do is nothing short of amazing. And really, when you think about it...instruments? WHOA. I mean who thinks of this stuff? Whether or not classical music is your thing, I highly recommend going to a live concert. It was great for us to try something different and I know we will be doing it again! Our local Art Museum does music on the lawn during the summer and I am already planning a good spot and thinking of which wine will go best with dusk....Happy Dating!

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Reader Response: What's in a Name?

An anonymous reader asked the following question via formspring. I love this story so I wanted to share the answer!

How did you choose the name Oscar for your son?

Jerry and I decided to spend our first anniversary in New York City. We wanted to make the most of our trip so we decided to take the train! We hopped on here in Raleigh and rode all the way to Penn Station. That trip was so much fun! I was 18 weeks pregnant with then un-named baby boy, who we referred to as Mr. Tumnus. We were absolutely convinced that we would have a girl and already had a complete girls name. Guess the joke was on us!

We love names from older generations. We always knew we would have what many people would consider an "old fashioned" name. We just hadn't settled on one yet. Before the trip, Jerry downloaded the top 100 names from the SSA for each decade from 1900 to the present. Since we were on the train for 10 hours straight, we took the time to each go through the list and highlight the names we liked. We then went through and crossed out the ones we hated from each other's lists and merged the two. The MOMENT I saw the name Oscar, I knew it was my name. I loved it. Jerry did too but always the practical one of us, wanted to go through all the names to be sure. We had just found out Oscar was a boy a few days before the trip. Deciding on his name made it so much fun to shop for him!

A lot of people choose biblical names, or names based on meaning or some other combination of reasons. For us, we knew that it just needed to be right for our family. We didn't really have many other requirements. Once we chose the name, we looked up the meaning and one definition is "divine spear". That is meaningful to us because the Bible talks about our children being arrows sent into the world by God. As Christians, we hope that Oscar will grow up to be used in a mighty way! Thanks for letting me relive those fun moments!

Have a question? Ask Away!

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The Importance of Date Night

When Jerry and I got married it seemed like everyone's first line of advice was to make Date night a priority. It's not a new idea and in my own life, I have been fortunate enough to have parents who have been faithful to each other in marriage for almost 43 years. And I can not think of a season in their marriage when dates were cut out. Like many families, we had seasons of more wealth than others. But even in those lean times, they would find a way to have a date. I remember a season when my folks were both working and very busy. They were just meeting their goals and really didn't have a lot of resources to go around gallivanting. But they made it work. Every Sunday morning, they would get up early, go through the drive through and get 2 breakfast sandwiches for $2 and drive to the dock with their lawn chairs. They would set up camp and eat their breakfast, talk and connect before another busy week. It was small, but intentional. Time and money can be hard to come by, but don't let excuses keep you from this very important factor in marriage! Whenever I hear my parents refer to dating, even all these years later, they most often refer to those humble dates at the dock.

This weekend, Jerry and I had planned a fancy date. We made reservations downtown to get sushi, planned on going to the newly released movie, Valentine's Day, and we were really looking forward to it. But as Saturday loomed closer and closer, with car trouble (the key broke off in the ignition of our older station wagon) and other various expenses, we feared that if we wanted to stay true to our budget, we might have to cancel. This was especially hard for me to consider because I was really eager to go out. But as we sat down together and ran some numbers, we realized we could still make a more modest date happen. We opted for our favorite pizza place and a movie we hadn't yet seen at the $1.50 theater. I still dressed up and did my hair, and we still had a great time! In fact, I think we might have had a better time!

 As we were standing in the lobby of the $1.50 theater we had some time to kill so we played an arcade game and I joked about Jerry getting me a stuffed animal in the "claw" game. Well he tried twice and I ended up with the ugliest stuffed dog you have ever seen. And I love it! We laughed and talked and carried on. It was really refreshing. And even though we really didn't talk about it, I think we were both proud of ourselves for sticking to our larger goal of not overspending. We saw the movie Couples Retreat which was both hilarious and heartwarming. Oscar was hanging out with his Aunt Amy and cousins Canyon and Aly and they also had a great time.

It was just what we needed.

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Blogging Lite and Our Anniversary!

This week, we have had Oscar's Mimi in town (aka Jerry's mom). I have been slack in the blogging area because with more activity and conversation in my daily life, my mind becomes incapable of retaining thoughts. Much less thoughts that are worth writing about. That said, we are having a great time! Jerry took off work Monday, Tuesday and today and we've been enjoying our little stay-cation. Oscar loves his Mimi and has really gotten over his shyness with her. We decided that if anyone wants to get in Oscar's good graces, all you have to do is camp out at our place for 3 days or more. Golden.

Yesterday was our 2 year anniversary. Because Mimi is here, we decided to leave Oscar overnight for the very first time! Initially, we were pretty nervous about it. And by we I mean *I* was worried. What mother wouldn't be? All the what ifs floating around in my sleep deprived head were enough to drive anyone crazy. But after having a few days to see Mimi and Oscar interact, I was completely at peace. When the time came to leave the house, I knew Oscar would have a great time and we would too! Before I go on, thanks Mimi!!!

We didn't go far. Jerry and I decided to stay in a hotel downtown so we would be close enough if we were needed but far enough to not wake up in the middle of the night :-). We also wanted to stay in town because with a baby, it's much more difficult to enjoy the nightlife and we wanted to chill in our city. What's funny is that the first place we went was Sam's Club! Jerry has had a membership for a while but we haven't had the chance to go together in forever to get me added to his account. So we did that. Jumbo TP here I come! We had too much fun walking around and "buying" computers, TVs, coffee makers, giant gorillas and other various items in our heads. We spent thousands of dollars in about an hour. Of course what we actually left with were a few clothing items and ibuprofen. Sam's Club is one of the few places that Jerry not only tolerates, but actually enjoys. It's always fun to see him shop there.

We made our way to the hotel and got checked in and all cleaned up for dinner. We had reservations for Sono, which is an amazing Sushi place for those that don't live in Raleigh. We LOVE sushi and it seems like every chance we get to have a night out, it is spent at Sono. But we don't mind! It's Raleigh Restaurant week too so they had some specials which worked out nicely. We each had an appetizer, 2 rolls, and dessert! SO delicious! If you decide to go, I HIGHLY recommend the Piano Roll. You can thank me later.

After dinner, we went to the Busy Bee Cafe to see our friend Martha who was in town for the evening. It just so happened that we were right around the corner so it worked out great! We miss Martha and Sam. Always. The end.

We had a great time there for a while and decided that we would take the R-Line bus back to our hotel. Those buses are NICE! I hadn't had the chance to ride one yet, but it was great. And FREE! The A/C was kickin and it was the perfect way to end our evening. We stopped into the top floor of our hotel to check out the bar but they closed at 10pm. Boo! We didn't know that but it wasn't a big deal. Our room was on the 19th floor so we still had an awesome view of our little city! This morning we had breakfast outside at The Morning Times and it was delightful. I am so glad we decided to stay in Raleigh. Just walking around made us appreciate living here. It's not that we couldn't do these things WITH Oscar, we just had a really great time on our 24 hour date :-) Happy Anniversary to us!

And of course Oscar and Mimi did great! He slept well and played and ate all his meals like a pro. This morning we got a picture text of him playing on the floor happy as can be. I am so glad it went well! What else would you expect from a 7 MONTH OLD??? First overnight, check! Where should we go next???

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I'm Still - I'm Still - Peter From the Wharf

As soon as Jerry and I decided that our honeymoon would start in San Francisco, we knew that we wanted to check out Alcatraz. We have both always been fascinated by "The Rock" and had to see it. Plus a nice ferry ride never hurt anyone. What we didn't realize is that you have to buy your ticket several days in advance. Since we were only there for two days, we knew we had to do something!

Upon arriving to San Francisco, our first order of business was to get some food! We decided to go to Fisherman's Wharf and get some seafood. I'll save that for another post because it was SO good... Anyway! We asked our waitress how we should go about getting tickets to Alcatraz for the next day. She said that since the ticket booth would be sold out, there are street vendors that you can usually get them from. Not shy about a good haggle, I was excited at the prospect.

We set off to find ourselves a street vendor and happened upon a corner store for Shell Vacations. Basically it's a time-share program and they give stuff away. We were greeted by a guy who gleefully referred to himself as "Peter from the Wharf". Each time he talked about somewhere we should go, he would say, "just tell them Peter from the Wharf sent you." Now it may be just me, but just because you add "from the Wharf" to your name, that doesn't make it any less common. I digress. After some discussion, we decided to take the gamble and sit through the schpeal. Here is how we got free tickets to Alcatraz:



In exchange for a $20 deposit, Peter from the Wharf signed us up for a 90 minute presentation for Shell Vacations the next morning. We did sacrifice our time, but it was well worth it! We made a pact that every answer would be no and off we went! For our 1.5 hours of time, we cleaned out with the freebies! Of course we didn't buy anything but here is what we got:

- The refund of our $20 deposit to 'hold our spot'
- Free Breakfast
- Free Parking at the Wharf
- FREE tickets to Alcatraz
- Tickets for a Trolley ride around town that we sold back for $20
- 2 free nights at a hotel (i.e. Hilton Head)
- The pleasure of meeting Peter from the Wharf!

We knew that handing over $20 was a gamble, but on the first day, we were willing to chance it for the fun and the possibility that it wasn't a scam. Let me tell you, those time share people are hilarious! And crafty! But we managed to say no no no thank you! We had a great time at Alcatraz and love that it was such a fun story!

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